college & career

Thinking about Responsibility.

Responsibility, a noun that means something different for everybody.  At least for me, what usually comes to mind is the idea of growing up and becoming an adult. When I was a child, I always felt as if being an adult was extremely far away. Suddenly though, here I am, faced with ‘adult decisions.’ Obviously, I am not completely thrown into adulthood yet, but that time is looming ever nearer and with it enormous amounts of responsibility I dread thinking about.

College is a topic on almost every high school teen’s thoughts, and increasingly on mine as well. What am I going to study? What school should I go to? How am I going to pay for all this? Thinking about these questions has caused me to be aware of just how much I’m going to have to take responsibility to make the choices that impact my future. However, none of us are really ‘in charge’ of paving the way for our life. Jeremiah 29:11 says “‘For I know the plans I have for you’ declares the Lord“. God has an ultimate plan for us, so our decisions should not be made in haste, but guided by Him.

However, that is so much easier said than done. Being the eldest of your siblings, like I am, comes with responsibilities as well. You are basically the one who has to do everything first – like going to college – without an older brother or sister to guide you. Yes, your parents are there to help, but this is their first time leading a child into adulthood, and they don’t really know what they are doing either. Not to mention you are expected to set an example and be a role model for your younger siblings. These factors can make almost any big decision daunting.

Every time a friend or teacher mentions something about college and planning for the future, I start to get anxious. I feel as if everyone is ahead of me and knows what to do with their life, while I’m still here trying to figuring it all out. When my mind goes to this place of stress, I tend to experience a sense of loneliness and hopelessness because I am afraid of the future and what is to come. I am prone to believe that I am not ready to handle the responsibilities that come with growing up, and I think a lot of other people tend to as well. We need to remember, though, that God is always there to take care of us and that He is in control, not us. Philippians 4:6-7  says, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

Just the thought of responsibility is enough to put me on edge sometimes, but Proverbs 16:4 says “The Lord works out everything to its proper end.” The responsibility of my future is not for me to worry about, but rather what I need to focus on is acting out God’s plan for me and to share His good news.

words by Grace Butler and photo by Hannah Jin

Just a crazy high school student with a love for weird music, delicious food and God. Currently located near Chicago, Illinois.

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